friends share

Most of us like Anthropologie. Most of us like candles. If you like candles from Anthropologie, brace yourself for good news… It involves Target. We all love Target.

I can’t even tell you how many times I’ve bought this candle ($28 Anthropologie) and burned it to ash. It may be my favorite scent on earth and it fills our home in about 20 minutes.

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So imagine my excitement to find this little gem with its humble $10 price tag…

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It couldn’t possibly be the very same candle, but my werewolf sense of smell tells me it’s incredibly close. Like, seriously – its incredible.

In other very exciting news, my daughter pooped in the bathtub last night. I mentally hi-fived myself for recently stocking up on Lysol and Clorox Cleanup… This message was not brought to you by Target. Promise.

I Think I’m Doing It Wrong…

The first time I heard about Craigslist was 2005. I didn’t have a car, a television or a “going out” dress.  I was living in San Francisco, making $11.10 an hour and sharing one toilet with FIVE roommates. I couldn’t even afford to browse other people’s unwanted junk.

Years later, I’m back in Maryland with unwanted junk of my own. I make regular donations to The Lupus Foundation every other month or so (they pick it up from your porch!), but today I rediscovered a new-ish cheap high chair that Kevin told me we didn’t need in the first place. I fed Elsa her first few solids in it and to the back of the closet it went. It mocks me. This thing needs to go. So I made my first ever post on Craigslist. My high chair. Tags attached. I could hardly wait for my first potential “customer.”

Maybe I never should have looked at the personals (NAKED PENISES ARE ON THERE OMFG.) Maybe I should have stopped checking my email after 9pm. Maybe I really need to stop watching “I Survived…” on Bio?

Every inquiry in my inbox is freaking me out.

Why are you looking at high chairs on Craigslist at 10pm?
Why would you ask me to meet you tonight – it’s 11pm?
Why did you stop responding when I suggested a public place?
What if they punch me in the face and run away with my cheap high chair AND $15?
Could I end up with a broken nose over $15?
Could they make my nose cuter if it had to be reset?
What if someone follows me home looking for more stuff?
What if they steal my kid?
Why did I think I could be normal about this?

Is anyone else like this or do I need my DVR privileges revoked?

In summation, this high chair may or may not be going back into the closet tomorrow.

Too crazy for craigslist.

Oh, Hello!

We’ve been sort of busy…





But I’m super sorry for the lapse in time.

More soon, promise!

the storm shelter

Greetings from the other side of impending doom (good one, www.theweatherchannel.com)!

After forecasters offered us fun words like “POUNDED” and “SLAMMED,” here we are. Not homeless, pounded or slammed. We were so lucky. Aside from some window leakage in the grub’s room, we moonwalked away from hurricane Irene cooler than Matthew McConaughey. The air outside smells like the boardwalk. The trees look fashionably slender. Creepy gross mushrooms grew in our yard overnight and the wheelbarrow left in our yard by a neglectful maintenance man is now full of mud water, mosquitos, centipedes and – well, who cares after centipedes? Nothing is worse than those guys.

I say we came out on top since we didn’t lose power. It did flicker to remind me to be grateful. I am.

We had fun yesterday. I made brownies and coconut-bourbon almond crusted tilapia. We watched Suckerpunch (boo). We took pictures! I drank wine while Kevin fell asleep on the couch… then I kept talking to him like he was awake because I was two glasses deep and needed to share my thoughts on the movie, twitter, wedding stuff, french bulldogs, skin care regimens, how much I weigh… you know, stuff guys like to talk about. I’m pretty considerate.

(And mark my (his) words – he said we could have a French Bulldog as long as he chose her name.)

Right now it’s close to 3am and if I don’t get to bed, I’ll probably be in a world of trouble tomorrow. So, pictures!

We took the trash out and got soaked together.


Later it was couch/party/attack time.

Finally, time to go upstairs for bath/bed. Tilapia & wine time for everyone in the house who pays taxes!

Okay, goodnight. I hope you’re all reading this on a brightly lit, fully charged screen in a brightly lit room with a tv on nearby just for background noise. Having your power on is a wonderful thing.

waiting.

What a ridiculous week.

Earthquake? Here?! Okay.

A few paintings. Minor heart attack. No big deal.

Hurricane? Ugh c’mon. Really?

Hopefully, this isn’t as bad as expected. We have some friends on the Eastern Shore  too stubborn to evacuate when ordered to do so.

 So we’re waiting. Any minute the power may go out. The grub will wake up from her nap. A tree may fall (please no please no please no).

And if we’re in one piece and the venue is still standing, we will be married one week from this very minute.

I hope everyone is safe and dry! I’m tired of my Twitter feed being dedicated to disasters (including the Kardashian wedding).

Booo.


thirteen

Oh, Elsa. You are 13 months old.

last week, actually…

You took your first awkward steps just after 11 months, but now – you’re sort of running. To watch you eat and walk are two of the most hilarious sights to take in right now.

You like coconut milk, veggie sticks, any type of cheese, bananas, berries  and tortilla chips. You don’t seem to care much for meat and vegetables (your pediatrician wasn’t excited about that). You weigh just over 20 pounds and at 30″ tall, you’re perfectly in the 50th percentile.

Spongebob, Yo Gabs, dogs, bath-time and airplanes make you point, clap and dance. Your voluntary hugs make dad and I melt into useless piles of pushover parental jelly.

We’ve survived your first fat lip, first scraped knee and later your first fully busted lip.  You didn’t seem to mind your injuries nearly as much as we did.

Thanks for that.

You can bring me your shoes when I ask you to, play with sidewalk chalk, gently pet a dog and hang tough in a tattoo shop.

More recently, you run wild in the streets wearing baby Toms…

Everything you do has me jabbing the person closest to me as to say “OMG RIGHT NOW! LOOK WHAT SHE’S DOING RIGHT NOW!” I mean – you’re cute eating a cheese quesadilla and all, but I guess it’s less magical to non-family members…

See? We’re learning too.